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Enough with the sunset

December 29th, 2018 Leave a comment Go to comments

Oh, I can see the headlines now: “Fall of the Roman Empire!” “Greed eats Rome alive!” The damn Persians will have a field day. Yet they won’t be inaccurate. Here we stand at the brink of our doom with no one to blame but ourselves. You’ll hear a lot of blame heaped on the barbarians, but the truth is we simply lost our way. A few too many orgies and internal lines of division, in a nutshell. This was never the way it should have gone in the West, yet here we stand amidst the shards of our former glory.

Well, the hell with it. I’m going Visigoth. That Euric is my kind of guy, and I hear he’s invading the Iberian peninsula soon. I’ve always wanted to go there. And honestly? Their culture fascinates me. That war march song they sing, “Staineins Ga-drauhts,” is enrapturing. The mosaic artwork is stunning, and their folklore is heroic while maintaining its humility. Even that weird stew they make is pretty good.

I get that this makes me look like a traitor to Rome. I do. But to stick with the empire would only reinforce the notion of our collective stubbornness, our snobbery. All great things meet their conclusions, and to recognize that and move on should be a sign of strength, not weakness, in my opinion. Pride has become the overriding disease within our society and I’m finally ready to divorce myself from it. Again, I realize how this makes me look.

But like I said, the hell with it. Take your togas and shove them where the sundial goes black. Keep your delusions of grandeur and rivers of sin coursing through the aquaducts, I’m done. There’s a new kid on the block and I’ve got anxious feet. See y’all in the underworld.

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