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I’m just a simple social conservative

December 15th, 2018 Leave a comment Go to comments

I understand that the world evolves, okay? Nothing lasts forever and I can accept that. Gosh, they even took M*A*S*H off the air, which I still miss, but I get it, I do. The world kept on spinning after the finale and it’s not like anyone died. It does seem like some things should be sacred though, right? Sometimes it feels like life is just moving too fast these days and that we should pump the brakes a little, take some time to collect our heads again.

When gay marriage was legalized, I didn’t freak out. Sure, I was a little disoriented for quite a while there, but I eventually came around and realized that love is love and it doesn’t happen the same way for everybody. I get it! But have you heard about the boy who married a “body pillow” in Korea? It had a face of an Annie May character on it. I guess that’s a TV show over there or something? If someone can marry a pillow, where does it stop? I’ve wanted to stay on the couch all day before but I never wanted to enter the sacred bond of matrimony with the silly thing!

And what’s all this about there being more than two genders? I’m told there’s now a spectrum. What the heck does that mean? I grew up with Barbie and Ken and that was it, but at Thanksgiving this year my grandson told me not to “assume his gender.” As if I hadn’t changed his diaper as a baby dozens of times! I’m not assuming anything, little mister. But he told me there’s a “state of mind” involved now, and I got confused very quick. Does that Korean boy’s pillow have a gender too, or is that “assuming” too much? It doesn’t make any sense!

I’m overwhelmed is all. There’s too much happening all at once and it makes my head swim. I was told the other day that we’re not even allowed to enjoy Laura Ingalls Wilder anymore because she said something racist once, or maybe a bunch of times. Again, change is fine and something that happens no matter what, but we’re zooming through it so fast that even Little House on the Prairie isn’t okay anymore? It’s so strange. I think I should go lie down.

Categories: shit
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